When it's time for a siesta...
You know that moment, when you've finally given her lunch and tucked her in for a siesta and you're longing for one yourself, noting with satisfaction her zonked out look, and the slow but sure movement of those little eyelids, inching towards sleep after a long, active morning in the sun - and suddenly those eyes flash open and she queries seriously, "Ma, are 'super' and 'special' the same?" - it's all you can do not to yell "sleep!" which would of course have the opposite effect intended.
I have now grown past the rookie response of yelling. I merely start to autorespond with a meaningless bit of soothing, alliterative prose that would lull her back... when I stop to actually hear her question again in my head. What actually are super and special? I am beginning to be curious myself so I launch full flow into an explanation.
"Okay. Let me see. Are 'super' and 'special' the same? They do sound the same, don't they? They both start with 's' too!"
I am winging it but there's a vague sense of clarity just under the surface... I continue exploring, "When something is special to you, it means you've done something extra with it - any ordinary thing can be made special because of how it is done... For example, I might give everyone paruppu saadam, but when I make paruppu saadam for you, I make it especially for you - I smash the rice so you wouldn't have to chew much, I add more paruppu so you get a lot of protein, I add more ghee so you get strength, I add a little bit more salt because you like it that way... That paruppu saadam is special because of the love and care I put into it. But whether it is super or not - that you decide, when you eat it." She is nodding, having just had the said paruppu saadam. I am getting clearer in my mind as I speak and the example is helping. There seems to be a lesson for me here, that I want to share with her. "And you know the really beautiful thing? Whatever you may say or do - whether it is tasty or not so tasty, whether you wipe your plate clean or waste most of it, whether you declare it is 'super' or not - that plate of rice will remain special. Because, 'special' is in the input, it is in what we do. 'Super' is in the output, it is in how people experience what we do. We have no control over super. But we can always make it special, with our love, our care, our touch. In fact, it occurs to me now, that's what Krishna said..."
By now, my little zen master has drifted off, with a smile... but I'm wide awake, in more ways than one.
I am winging it but there's a vague sense of clarity just under the surface... I continue exploring, "When something is special to you, it means you've done something extra with it - any ordinary thing can be made special because of how it is done... For example, I might give everyone paruppu saadam, but when I make paruppu saadam for you, I make it especially for you - I smash the rice so you wouldn't have to chew much, I add more paruppu so you get a lot of protein, I add more ghee so you get strength, I add a little bit more salt because you like it that way... That paruppu saadam is special because of the love and care I put into it. But whether it is super or not - that you decide, when you eat it." She is nodding, having just had the said paruppu saadam. I am getting clearer in my mind as I speak and the example is helping. There seems to be a lesson for me here, that I want to share with her. "And you know the really beautiful thing? Whatever you may say or do - whether it is tasty or not so tasty, whether you wipe your plate clean or waste most of it, whether you declare it is 'super' or not - that plate of rice will remain special. Because, 'special' is in the input, it is in what we do. 'Super' is in the output, it is in how people experience what we do. We have no control over super. But we can always make it special, with our love, our care, our touch. In fact, it occurs to me now, that's what Krishna said..."
By now, my little zen master has drifted off, with a smile... but I'm wide awake, in more ways than one.
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